• Oct. 1, 2003
• By Shawn
• In Politics
• 7 Comments
• 0

So, someone in the White House squealed. Verbal opponent to the White House’s claims of evidence and U.S. ambassador, Joseph Wilson, has a wife. She’s a spy. Now the Justice Dept. is staging an official whodunit to find the performer of the felonious act.

Know what? I don’t care. It doesn’t matter.

99% of Justice Department inquiries into this kind of thing turn up jack, if they don’t fade into the dust before that. Add that to the fact that Congress and White House are run by the same party.

This could very easily be smoke and mirrors. Granted, I’m falling victim once again to my one major flaw with this administration: giving them credit for having brains, much less the Machiavellian minds that their predecessors have had. But, fact remains, W.’s losing the popularity contest fast. It’s in the papers every day, and he’s not gaining any ground. When would be a better time to fill the front pages with fluff, buy some time, stall until the next round? Some a-hole is one of thousands to stand up in front of everyone and call you on a bluff (and you’re bluffing.) Write that asshole’s name down. Time comes, we’ll screw him to the wall. What’s that? He’s clean? But his wife is a spy. Ooh. Spies. Tom Clancy, Mission Impossible, James Bond. People love that shit. Leak it. Someone on our staff is a dickweed? Fine, when we drag out the investigation as long as we can, hand out his name. Give him a severance and a monogrammed tennis racquet for Club Fed.

It’s not impossible. In fact, it’s not uncommon; it’s how things work.

Now for the humor. Here’s a 9/30/03 quote from monkeyfucker himself, his first public admission to the event: “if there is a leak out of my administration, I want to know who it is. If the person has violated law, the person will be taken care of.”

Now, here’s a bit of the Monty Python sketch improvised by the White House and the Press the day before:
QUESTION: Why doesn’t [President Bush] simply ask those – if, indeed, this is true – to come forward and …
McCLELLAN: Ask who?
QUESTION: The President of the United States-
McCLELLAN: Ask who?
QUESTION: The limited number of people-
McCLELLAN: That’s the Department of Justice, I just said, is the appropriate agency.
QUESTION: Why doesn’t he ask them to come forward and hand in their resignations?
McCLELLAN: But who? I said that it’s a serious matter, and anyone should be pursued to the fullest extent of the law.
QUESTION: -why doesn’t he use everything in his power to smoke them out?
McCLELLAN: The Department of Justice is looking into this. I’ve made it very clear the President believes the leaking of classified information of this nature is a very serious matter, and it should be pursued to the fullest.
QUESTION: And he has no – his hands are tied? He can’t simply ask his staff?

(Here’s the whole sketch, as well as a bunch of other goodies.)

So, if I had the choice between this, and what was on the front pages before, I’d like to see the real stuff that was burying the White House. A personnel problem is not newsworthy. If I had it my way, there’d be every report of every dead GI on the front page every day.

By the way, 1 soldier dead, 2 wounded. Wanna guess the country? C’mon, place your bets! And the ball drops in… Afghanistan (told ya that one’s coming back). And they weren’t cleaning their rifles either.

The Justice Dept. wants to conduct an investigation? Fine. How bout lying to Congress, us, the UN, the EU, and the kitchen sink so we can blow the shit out of a sovereign nation? I don’t care specifically what’s on the front pages, as long as it’s not a bunch of irrelevant crap that detracts from the hole that the White House has dug itself.